Losing Weight Without Making Ourselves Miserable

Hi, friends!

Once upon a time, Jared and I did a lot of walking. For most of our first year of marriage, we lived on the third floor of our apartment building and we never bothered driving to campus because BYU's parking situation is just stupid. We'd walk to and from campus for classes and I'd sometimes walk a little more and go to Sonic or Macey's during the day. (Macey's is one of the things I miss most about Utah. Those enormous ice cream cones are so great!)

These days, walking around Walmart is pretty much the most exercise we get. Sure, I could walk somewhere while Jared is at work, but going outside when it's hot, blindingly sunny, and windy enough to make tears shoot horizontally out of my eyes just doesn't have the same appeal as my Provo pedestrian peregrinations.

What do you get when you take a Lizzie who hates exercise and make her even more sedentary without adjusting her eating habits? Weight gain! Yaaaay.

I weighed about 120 pounds when we left BYU. Gradually, I gained back the weight I lost before my wedding, fluctuated for a while, and have been hovering around 140. That isn't terrible, but it's also not ideal for someone who's 5'3" with small bone structure. There's also the issue that my body seems to like putting its extra weight in basically the same place a baby bump shows up. If I wear the wrong outfit, I sort of look like I'm in the early stages of pregnancy, which I am not. I'd like that to stop for fairly obvious reasons.

After months of idly hoping that I'd shrink back down without trying, I finally started tracking my calorie intake on the My Fitness Pal app at the beginning of March. Jared agreed to start this process with me, and we've been doing pretty well so far!

Weight loss is generally rather simple, barring health conditions that make it more complicated. (Not easy, mind you. Simple.) If you consume more calories than you burn, your weight goes up. If you have a reasonable calorie deficit, you'll see your weight slowly drop. There are lots of ways to go about achieving that calorie deficit. Some people opt to exercise a lot, completely change their eating habits, cut out certain things entirely, and/or generally torture themselves. However, being miserable is not a requirement for weight loss, and Jared and I are proof of that.

What we've done is pay attention to the number of calories we eat in a day and keep it below a certain threshold, as determined by My Fitness Pal. (As a 5'3" woman who doesn't exercise, I get 1200 calories per day. Those 1200 calories can go pretty quickly if I'm not careful.) We keep track of everything we eat, measure portions, and log it on our phones. We looked online for low-calorie foods and snacks so that we'd have some better options in our kitchen and still be able to feel full.

The changes we've made:

• Our standard PB&J has been mostly replaced with meat-and-cheese sandwiches.
• Jared sometimes has oatmeal instead of cereal and I have almond milk with my cereal every morning. (Jared gets 1600 calories per day, which is enough to spare that he still uses normal milk when he has cereal. I'm quite jealous.)
• The only ice cream in our freezer is low-calorie ice cream sandwiches and fudgesicles.
• We quit buying Cheez-Its because I have absolutely no self-control when it comes to cheesy crackers and a serving of them is depressingly tiny. I could very easily and happily consume all of my daily calories in the form of Cheez-Its.

What we've learned so far:

• Drinking your calories is not worth it. I used to drink 2% milk all the dang time. Considering one cup of milk is a tenth of my daily calories, I can't usually justify it these days. Once I hit my target weight and start trying to maintain instead of lose weight, I'll have more wiggle room and milk can be part of my daily life again.
• It's a lot easier to do this with someone else. I send him encouraging texts when someone brings donuts to work, he steers me away from the things I stare longingly at in the grocery store, and we aren't causing temptations for each other by eating calorie bombs because we're in the same low-cal boat together.
• Fruit is my friend. I can eat a ton of strawberries and barely dent my daily calorie allotment! Also, fruit is delicious.
• We can still eat the unhealthy stuff that we love as long as we think it through. I made boxed macaroni and cheese with no butter and just a splash of milk, which tasted basically the same (to me, at least) and had way fewer calories. If we sleep in late on a Saturday, I can totally get away with eating half of a medium cheese pizza from Domino's because that will be one meal and then I have 360 calories remaining for a second meal that day. We ate lunch at Chik-fil-A while we were out of town a while ago and the only reason I went over my limit that day was because I couldn't resist an Oreo milkshake. Curse you, delicious milkshake...
• Almond milk is disgusting, but certain cereals can mask its ickiness. Oreo O's still taste pretty awesome with almond milk. Trix tastes tolerable. Rice Crispies don't have enough flavor to hide the yuck. No cereal I've found has made me want to drink the remaining "milk" once the cereal itself is gone.
• My biggest weaknesses are pizza, fries, milkshakes, Oreo-related things, Cheez-Its, and milk. :(
• It can be discouraging to have to keep this up for so long in order to see results. As nice as it would be to get rid of my 20ish extra pounds in a short amount of time, that's really unhealthy. It is nice to see the number on the scale going down bit by bit! Progress is being made!

So, that's the general idea of how things have been for the first month of this journey towards weighing less! Neither of us have noticed any significant differences in the way we look yet. That makes sense, though; we're losing a pound or two each week, as we planned, which means I'm only down by six pounds so far. Jared has actually lost seventeen, though ten of those pounds disappeared weirdly quickly, since that was apparently water weight. I promise neither of us are developing any eating disorders.

One month down, probably a few more to go. Woo! :)

Love,
Lizzie

Six Months Of Blogging

Hi, friends!

It's been half a year since I started posting something on this blog every Friday. That schedule is pretty much the only consistent thing happening here. The topics are all over the place and some posts get nine views while others have gotten over two hundred. Sometimes I have pictures to include and other times it's only text.

It's been fun to have a place to dump my thoughts about stuff that isn't necessarily related to the things going on in my life. I do enjoy writing and coming up with interesting topics to talk about. However, I've discovered that it can sometimes be a challenge to post something every week. I'm not sure why I set that initial goal. I'm proud that I was able to stick to it for this long, especially given my history of trying to keep a journal and almost immediately failing at it. I think from now on, though, I'll start posting when I have something I want to talk about instead of trying to force myself into writing mode when my mind is elsewhere or unsure of what to say. It's silly to write simply for the sake of having something to share so that I can meet an arbitrary goal I decided on back when I was full of ideas for my new blog.

The weekly updates were probably going to be interrupted in the next few months anyway. I'm going to YW camp again at the end of June, flying to Michigan less than a week later for a family reunion, and then flying to Baltimore a few weeks after that for Bronycon.

Maybe ditching my schedule will mean the content quality will improve. I'm sure a lot of the stuff I write will still be silly and/or uninteresting to a lot of people, but that's okay. Anyone who comes here expecting an in-depth analysis of the themes found in classic paintings clearly doesn't know me very well. :)

As always, if there's something you want me to write about, suggestions are welcome!

Love,
Lizzie

Brie Larson Doesn't Hate White Men

Hi, friends!

Captain Marvel, the latest Marvel movie, has just come out! Jared and I went to the early showing at our local theater last night and had a great time. It isn't the best Marvel movie ever, but I really enjoyed it and loved a lot of things about the movie overall and Carol herself. I'm excited to see what part she plays in Avengers: Endgame next month (whoa!) and how she interacts with our other beloved heroes. This enthusiasm is not shared by all Marvel fans, though.

Brie Larson, who portrays Captain Marvel, has angered a small - but very vocal - group of people. Those "fans" are making negative comments on every promotional post they can find on Marvel's various social media pages. They're shouting from the rooftops that they refuse to see this movie in theaters or support it in any way. These people are part of the reason why Rotten Tomatoes stopped allowing users to rate a movie that hadn't been released yet; the "audience score" for Captain Marvel was getting bombed by negativity before the movie had even hit theaters. (Honestly, I don't see why it was ever an option to do that anyway. If you want to give your opinion on the movie based on the trailer, that's why being able to comment on the trailer itself is a thing.)

So what did Brie do? There are a few main complaints I've seen, ranging from odd to stupid. Let's go through them, shall we?

Issue #1: She's trying to promote diversity
This is where the whole "she hates white men and doesn't want their money" thing comes from. Essentially, she wants journalists and critics who aren't white men to be given the opportunities they deserve. She wants people to be able to read the thoughts of reviewers who they can relate to and will give different perspectives. There was a recent study showing that almost 80% of top film critics are men and only 2.5% are women of color, and that's why Brie has been trying to get more people of different backgrounds to do her interviews. She realized that it was generally harder for certain groups of people to get those jobs and decided to bring attention to that.
There's an infamous quote from a speech she gave where she said, "I don't need a 40-year-old white dude to tell me what didn't work about A Wrinkle In Time." That's where the review bombers like to stop reading. However, she continued, "I want to know what it meant to women of color, biracial women, to teen women of color. Am I saying I hate white dudes? No, I am not. What I'm saying is if you make a movie that is a love letter to women of color, there is an insanely low chance a woman of color will have a chance to see your movie and review your movie." (Obviously, women of color can go see movies that come to regular theaters, but Brie was talking specifically about smaller movies shown at film festivals in this case. If those movies don't get good reviews, that can be where their journey stops.)
What she's saying makes sense to me. I liked Black Panther, but I'm sure it was more meaningful to black viewers. My review wouldn't be as interesting to read as one written by someone who could truly understand where Killmonger was coming from or who had never seen so many people with a skin tone similar to their own in one movie before. If you ask an adult what they thought about an episode of Dora The Explorer, they'll probably say they weren't impressed. Asking a little kid about that same episode would most likely give you a different result. Personally, I don't particularly care what critics think about things, but I understand why it's important to get the opinions of a variety of people in order to get a better idea of what something is like.
Would you want to read my review of a movie about moving to a new school halfway through the year, the hardships of being in the military, having your parents divorce, or how difficult it is to raise kids? Maybe, but a review written by someone who has actually experienced those things for themselves would be much more meaningful and insightful. How would I know if the movie did those things justice? You might as well ask me to write about a sports movie. (This kind of thing is why those YouTube videos like "Real Doctor Watches Grey's Anatomy" are so popular.)
Anyway, Brie never said she wants white guys to stop watching or even reviewing things. She simply wants qualified people of all backgrounds to be given a voice. Unfortunately, the internet is always looking for reasons to be offended and ways to twist intentions, so there are some people who never heard the full story and are clinging to the part that makes them think Brie is prejudiced against them.

Issue #2: She's emotionless / doesn't smile enough
Perhaps trying to save the earth from aliens and recover details about your forgotten past isn't a very joyful experience. This complaint is absurd for several reasons. Do you remember Doctor Strange smiling very much in his movie? I don't. How many smiles were there in Infinity War? (About two minutes of them, apparently.)

These edited posters (made by @heymermaid on Twitter) show us why there aren't usually big grins on promotional images for superhero movies. Only Gilderoy Lockhart would be concerned about how photogenic he is while he's fighting.

Carol does smile. She tells jokes. She sings karaoke at a bar with her friend. However, given that the focus of the movie is about danger, fighting, figuring out who she used to be, not knowing who to trust, and other not-super-cheerful things, it's understandable that she doesn't just walk around smiling all the time. I definitely don't walk around smiling all the time and my life is significantly less dangerous and complicated than hers is. But hey, I've also been told I need to smile more, that my neutral face looks hostile, etc., so what do I know?
This kind of thinking makes a brief appearance in the movie. Shortly after she arrives on earth, Carol is told by a random guy on a motorcycle that she should smile. (Spoiler alert: Motorcycle Bro does not receive a smile in response. It's almost like telling a woman that she should smile isn't likely to make her happy.)
Actual semi-spoilery-but-not-really stuff here: Carol was trained to restrain her emotions and got in trouble for showing them. Her commander says something like "humor is a distraction" when she tries to have some fun while they're sparring. In another scene, she's joking with her fellow soldiers but everyone quickly shifts back into serious mode when the commander approaches. The Kree warriors are told to do things "for the good of all Kree" and do so without showing feelings.
On top of that, she was in the Air Force prior to becoming a Kree soldier. She was mocked by other airmen who saw her as weak or less than because of her gender. Some people think showing emotion is a sign of weakness, and since women are stereotypically more emotional, she probably started repressing her emotions even before her Kree commander started drilling that into her head for several years. She must have been constantly trying to prove herself to be just as good as her male counterparts, doing things like the side project with Lawson for that reason.

Issue #3: Brie doesn't have a nice chest or butt
Yes, this is actually something that people have whined about. Lovely, right? I prefer to focus on the fact that she could push a Jeep after all the physical training she did for this role. I wonder how many of the human turds grumbling that she isn't attractive enough for them are able to do that.

Issue #4: She's "ruining Marvel by making it political"
Because giving a female hero her own movie and an actress trying to fight discrimination are both political, apparently. The kinds of people who say this must not be very familiar with things like, oh, I don't know, Captain America punching Hitler in 1940, the fact that Black Panther was created in the 1960s, or the "mutants are bad" mentality in the X-Men stories. Stan Lee was always trying to make the world a better place through his work.

This message from Stan was published in 1968.

Here's one from 1963. Stan Lee was a treasure.

This movie was planned for years. It wasn't a sudden, "Oh, lots of movies are getting all-female remakes, so I guess we should do a girl hero now!" afterthought. Prior to seeing it for myself, I was a little worried that the pendulum would swing too far and they'd convey the message that her being a woman makes her better than other heroes; true feminism is about balance and equality, not women being superior to men. Fortunately, the movie portrayed her as a fantastic hero, not only as a fantastic female hero, just as Fury is a great SHIELD agent, not only a great black SHIELD agent. Marvel wasn't patting themselves on the back for including a woman or a black man. He is black, she is female, and that's simply what it is. (And Goose is a great kitty who happens to have ginger fur. I can't get through this entire post without mentioning Goose!)

There's also the fact that several of the other Marvel stars are openly political. Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Don Cheadle, Samuel L. Jackson, and Chris Pratt share their views on social media and nobody seems to mind. (Well, some people hate Chris Pratt for being religious/conservative, but that's a different subject.) Humans are allowed to have opinions about things. Other humans are allowed to disagree.

It's completely fine to have genuine complaints about the movie or Brie herself. She probably could have been more tactful when she said this or that. Some people say the pacing of the story is off. Jared thinks Carol's personality is a bit flat (and had two other gripes with the movie that would spoil plot things, so I won't mention them here). Those are valid things to think; this movie isn't immune to criticism simply because it's about a female superhero. It's good to still have thoughts about the good and bad of Captain Marvel. Giving it a 10/10 review for the sole reason that Carol is a woman is about as helpful as the people who give 5-star reviews to products they've purchased but haven't received yet.

Hopefully this clears up some of the nonsense that's been floating around the internet recently. I did get a bit snarkier than usual; I think that was some of the built-up frustration from seeing all sorts of idiotic complaints about this movie. (Some people were even moaning about how much Marvel has been advertising for it. You know, because the other Marvel movies never get advertised. Give me a break!) Instead of engaging the buffoons who choose to spend their time posting about how little they care about this movie, I decided to yell type into the void and post this here.

Go see this movie if it's something you're interested in or skip it if you're as sick of superhero movies as James Cameron believes the general population is. Just don't boycott it because of misunderstandings or ignorance.

Love,

Lizzie

Unpopular Opinions

Hi, friends!

It's time to get controversial! Prepare to potentially not like me as much after this.

• Instagram is dumb and I hate it. I'd be willing to give it another try if the feed was chronological, but some monster decided to use an algorithm instead. Also, the commenting system seems disorganized.
• I don't like dogs. Call me a heartless monster all you want. If your dog is smallish, calm, reasonably cute/fluffy, trained not to bark all the time, and respectful of personal space, I'll be okay with it and maybe pet it. Otherwise, I will be mildly to highly uncomfortable for the entire time it's close enough to potentially lick me.
• Hawkeye and Black Widow are amazing and belong with the other Avengers, even if they don't have actual superpowers. They're genetically normal (in the MCU, at least) human beings who are skilled enough to help save the world from the Chitauri and Ultron and Thanos's army because of their training, dedication, and hard work. Sure, they aren't as strong as Hulk or Thor, but strength isn't the only thing that matters. I'd like to see Hulk sneak around to gather intel or Thor do a stealth takedown.
• Babies aren't usually very cute. They get better after a while, but newborns aren't at the cutest stage of life.
• Dipping fries into a chocolate milkshake/Frosty is totally fine. I've also been known to dip my chicken nuggets into my shake, even though I think ketchup and other normal dipping mediums are nasty. I don't get it either.
• Leggings are not, and never will be, actual pants. They're tights that are slightly less see-through.
• Public proposals are horrifying. If Jared had tried to propose in front of a bunch of people or orchestrated a big spectacle, I probably would've panicked and run away. You can announce your engagement to the universe and post a thousand pictures of your ring later; just enjoy the special experience with your future spouse and forget the rest of the world exists for a few minutes.
• Toy Story 3 wasn't nearly as good as everyone says it was.
• There is no "best" Hogwarts House, nor is there a "worst" House. Each one has good and bad people who each have strengths and flaws. Quit bullying Hufflepuffs and Slytherins.
• JK Rowling should've just stopped talking about Harry Potter after the end of the seventh book. Fantastic Beasts, Cursed Child, and her weird factoids don't exist in my world.
• Luxury and designer things are silly. Even if I somehow become a millionaire, I will never be able to justify spending $200 on a purse. Brand names really don't matter unless you're purposefully trying to show off how wealthy you are, which is just tacky. (I remember reading that some designer brand was destroying their unsold products instead of donating them to people in need because they wanted to remain excluUuUusive. Yuck.)
• Exercise is the worst and the whole "It gives you endorphins!!" thing doesn't seem to apply to me. I don't feel happy after I run, just sweaty and uncomfortable.
• Twilight was an enjoyable book series. The movies aren't nearly as good but they're... tolerable, I suppose. But not handsome enough to tempt me.
• Cold, cloudy weather is infinitely better than sunny days and warmth/heat. If I could comfortably wear a hoodie all year round, I would be so happy.
• I like to dip bagels (and rolls and other forms of bread) into drinks. Milk, sparkling cider, juice, Kool-Aid... It sounds gross, but I love it. And it makes me less likely to start hiccuping like I sometimes do after eating bread.
• Overly bold eyebrows and super visible highlighter are going to be the makeup trends that people will look back on in a few years and say "Ughhh, why?!" about. You know how it's obvious that a picture was taken in the early 2000s if someone has really tweezed eyebrows and frosty eyeshadow? Sharpie brows and shiny noses will be the equivalent indicators of this time period.
• I don't understand the appeal of tablets. They're basically giant smartphones that don't have phone numbers. People try to pretend that they'll replace laptops even though laptops are way, way easier to work with and only slightly less portable.
• Alcohol is another thing I don't understand. From what I can tell, it usually tastes sort of gross unless you really disguise the flavor. After you've essentially poisoned yourself, you have a whole bunch of negative side effects that don't stop messing you up for several hours. There's a good chance you'll throw up, do something dumb, hurt yourself or someone else, or do all of those in the same night. How does any part of that sound fun? I make enough poor decisions without being impaired.

So, any teeth clenching? Eye rolls, perhaps? Feel free to tell me your unpopular opinions or give your opinions on the ones I shared! :)

Love,

Lizzie